How To Love Audaciously

If you've read some of my earlier posts, then you know that I started out this year with some pretty lofty goals for myself. I've managed to keep up with most of them, but one that has fallen slightly short is my reading. I have always loved reading. As a little girl I ate up every American Girl Doll book available. Then again, there were only six American Girl Dolls back then. I know, I'm old. Now there are probably two dozen, plus all the "design your own" and specialty dolls! It makes my poor, sweet, original Samantha doll seem, well, "vintage." Then I moved on to animal rescue stories, and stories about girls who loved horses. In my teenage years I loved historical fiction, Shakespeare, the Left Behind series, and Frank Peretti. Yes, my taste has always been eclectic.

As an adult, my tastes have slowly turned more towards the classics, such as Jane Austen, and women's encouragement literature (my personal classification for self-help books for Christian women). I've got so many books at home that I'm out of shelves and the shelves I do have are sagging under the weight of every last novel, biography, and Bible study I've ever owned. I can't part with them. I think back to books like Fahrenheit 451 and The Book Thief in which books were precious commodities to be cherished, and I just can't let go. I want my kids to know the real feeling of turning pages and smelling that just-cracked-binding smell that I've learned to love. I know they'll probably roll their eyes at me, their painfully old-fashioned mom, and point at what will probably be a small pile of Kindles charging in the corner. Nevertheless, my children will appreciate books if I have anything to say about it.

That being said, I just don't have as much time to read anymore as I'd like. Nowadays I'm lucky to catch a few pages in the bath or before bed or, yes I'm not ashamed to admit it, on the toilet. That doesn't change the fact that I love it and continue to buy books like they're going out of style. Partially because they are. The day Barnes & Noble goes under I will have to observe a very real period of mourning. So, I'm renewing my determination this month to read at least one book per month. It's the end of May, and so far this year I've read three books, if you count those I've been using for my women's Bible study, otherwise only...one.

But let me tell you what, that one book is a doozy! I don't know that I chose it so much as it chose me, or rather God smacked me across the face with it. I've actually read it all the way through TWICE now this year, that's how much I love it! That can count as two books this year, technically, right?! I read it through and loved it so much I had to go back and read it through again so I could highlight all the life-changing moments, which means it's now peppered with neon yellow paragraphs and dog-eared pages. This book spoke to me in a way that I haven't experienced in years. I could feel God working in my heart and revolutionizing my mind with every chapter. It has literally changed my life and the way I approach my relationship with God. So what is this magical book?!

Audacious, by Beth Moore

If you run in Christian circles for long, you will know the name Beth Moore. Her Bible studies have been changing lives for decades. Her latest installation, Audacious, does not disappoint! It's not her typical book either. Mrs. Moore usually digs into Scriptures focusing on topics like the lives of Biblical figures such as Esther, Daniel, and David. She has stirred hearts with toe-stomping studies like When Godly People Do Ungodly Things and Believing God. And she's pierced straight to our hearts with works like Breaking Free and So Long, Insecurity. But Audacious is different. Audacious is written as though you're sitting in Starbucks with Beth Moore herself and she's pouring her heart out to you. She's sharing her desire, "To see all women come to know and audaciously love Jesus Christ." 

First, she takes time to explain to you her choice of words. There are many words that could be used to describe the ideal relationship with Christ. Mrs. Moore chose audacious because it's not the first or even the tenth word that probably comes to mind, and yet it perfectly epitomizes what our relationship should look like to the rest of the world. The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines it this way:

audacious, adjective

[Middle French audacieux, from audace boldness, from Latin audacia, from audac-, audax bold, from audere to dare, from avidus eager...]

1. a: intrepidly daring: ADVENTUROUS

b: recklessly bold: RASH

2. contemptuous of law, religion, or decorum: INSOLENT

3. marked by originality and verve

Ignoring the second definition and focusing solely on the first and third definitions...can you imagine if our love for Christ was intrepidly daring, adventurous, and marked by originality and verve?! The world would be changed in so many ways. And the amazing thing about this concept is that you don't have to be an extrovert or social butterfly to make it work. Beth Moore admits that even she would often rather stay at home with a hot cup of something and a good book. Having an audacious love for Christ simply means that you pursue Him passionately and in such a way that the world cannot fail to see His love through you. You can do that right where you are, whether you work professionally, stay at home, or are otherwise limited. God can and will use you if you will only love Him and pursue Him with an audacious love. 

Isn't that great?! It's so simple that it might seem almost silly to you. But I promise, there are so many foundational ideas in this book that will revolutionize your life if you allow them to. I had to go back and read it again just so that I could highlight them! It's a short book at only 178 pages, so it's a quick read too. If you're like me, however, you'll end the book both satisfied and yearning for more - more fellowship, more passion, more meat. It'll light a fire in your heart that has the promise of an audacious, eternal blaze if you're willing to continue fanning it. I personally feel empowered to be the woman God wants me to be, and I don't even have to leave home to do it (yet). Don't worry, I'm not going to turn into a cloistered nun or a happy hermit. It's just so liberating to know that I don't have to go outside of my house or look anywhere other than my worn old Bible to find audacious, passionate, exhilarating love. I could quote half the book to you at this point, but I won't do that to you. Instead, I will leave you with this quote (yes, I know it's long - hang in there!):

Full boldness [is], at the very same time, welcoming. That's how we're also meant to live, speak, and serve people. Boldness says that we don't see every little obstacle as some big hindrance. We're not too fragile to adapt and too finicky to accept. Boldness says that each circumstance is up for rent as an opportunity. What we're willing to do with the room we've been given is up to us. Boldness makes the best of it...Hopelessness is a liar. A convincing one. We offer it no welcome, no couch to rest upon, no meal to feast upon...

Because the eternal purpose of God was fully accomplished in Jesus, we are authorized, urged, exhorted, and expected to approach His throne with absolute boldness.

Confidently. Audaciously. Like we believe what He says. Like we receive what He's done. Like we accept who we are. Like we know what it took. The exorbitant price He paid for our access is worthy of nothing less. 

(Audacious, by Beth Moore; emphasis mine)

BOOM. 

Read that again, chew on it for a moment, let it sink into the very depths of your heart and mind. The God of the universe, the same God who set the stars in place and knows every hair on your head, paid the ultimate price - an ugly, brutal, evil death on a Roman cross - for YOU to be able to have a relationship with Him. How can we afford not to pursue it with audacity and fiery passion?! He demands and deserves nothing less than a love that consumes every last microscopic iota of our being.

I encourage you to read this book and join me in pursuing God with an audacious love. Do you dare?

Hapless but hopeful,

Cassie

Ps - Stay tuned for more book reviews in the coming months! These books are next up on my list:

Finding Purpose

In case you haven't noticed, I took a break from blogging. I've only been doing this for a few months, and already I had to take a break. Why, you might ask? Well, because life happens, and sometimes when it does we can lose focus and feel like we're floundering.

• I just completed the most difficult semester so far of my MA in Crisis & Trauma Counseling. I haven't written that much since my "History of the Middle East" class in college!
• My baby has popped out  seven teeth in the past four months, and she's walking so she's into everything.
• My husband has been traveling almost every week for work. With great power (promotion)...
• I traveled to Georgia last week (to see my little brother graduate from the University of Georgia - GO DAWGS!). 

The past few weeks have just been overwhelmingly busy for so many reasons. On top of that, I felt like I needed to take time to reflect on God's will - for this blog and for my life. I needed to refocus and figure out what God wants, and how I fit into His plan. I truly have a passion to share with others, especially women, about how God is speaking in my life.
I know that life as a wife, mother, friend, etc. is not easy. I know that sometimes we cry out to God when we feel overwhelmed and it seems like we're alone in so many ways.

But we're not alone. 

You're not alone. 

There is so much pressure on moms and wives these days. We all bear labels that, to those who don't know us, define us and carry certain stereotypes that are often unfair. Whether you're a Working Mom, a Stay-At-Home Mom, a Work-From-Home Mom, a Single Mom, a Divorced Mom (the list goes on)...it doesn't matter, we all struggle to do our absolute best to care for our families. My hope and prayer, and the way in which I feel God is leading me in this blog, is to hopefully speak hope, joy, and peace into your lives no matter what your role as Mom and/or Wife entails.

After talking with God over the past month, I feel renewed in my desire to share my heart with anyone who is willing to read and grow along with me. So if you'll be patient with me, I would love to continue to chat with you about passions, experiences, and life in the most honest way I can and just see how God uses us to impact others. Will you take this journey with me? Grab your coffee (shout-out to tea drinkers too), say a small prayer, and dive into this with me. I don't know where we're going, but I promise to do my best to keep our focus on God. I don't want to do His work, so much as I want Him to work through me. Does that make sense?
As always, I welcome any input you may have and certainly would love to hear what is on your hearts. I will be praying for this blog and for you, the beautiful reader on the other side of this magical thing we call the Internet. I will be praying that God helps us to grow in His love, wisdom, and strength, and that He will grant you peace and success as you work hard to care for your families.   In Matthew 18:20, Jesus says, "For where two or three gather together in My name, there I am with them." I firmly believe that even though we may be miles, states, oceans and continents apart, Jesus will still be with us as we dig into His word and seek His face.
God bless you!

Hapless but hopeful,
Cassie

The Secret to Perfect Prayer

When a doctoral student at Princeton asked, "What is there left in the world for original dissertation research?" Albert Einstein replied, "Find out about prayer. Somebody must find out about prayer." 

Quoted in Leadership Journal (Winter 1983)

Chances are you're similar to me and Sheila Walsh in that you have spent the majority of your life trying to figure out how to pray. As children we're taught to bow our hands, fold our hands together, and even kneel when we pray. Often children are taught form prayers such as, "Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep..." As adults we may hold others' hands and take turns praying, addressing God in any number of ways ("Father God...Dear Lord...etc.). "Think about it - how many times have we been asked topiary in public and, instead of talking with God using the manner and words we offer at home, we find our "spiritual" voices, religious vocabulary, and pious pose?" (Sheila Walsh, Get Off Your Knees And Pray) I've even heard some people start their prayers "Hey God." The traditionalist in me balks at such a casual approach. But is it really wrong? Is there a "right" way to pray?

I've had days where I sat in the sun, soaking in its warmth and praising God for the innumerable blessings in my life. Then there are the days when I couldn't stand and just cried out to God in a crumpled, sobbing heap on the floor. There are also all those normal, mundane days when I took 5-10 minutes in the morning or as I drove along in the car to just "say a quick prayer," in an attempt to ensure I check the box for "daily prayer." My prayer life has been inconsistent and selfish at best. But how do I fix that? What is the "right" way to pray?!

Will Rogers said, "The trouble with our praying is, we just do it as a means of last resort." Why is it that we only seem capable of sincere prayer when we're under pressure? I'm just as guilty as anyone else, although I've been trying to improve over the last few years. But I've stumbled at times, trying to deal with some of the typical questions, such as "if God's will is already pre-determined, what's the point of praying?" Sometimes I feel like I don't get answers, and it's discouraging to feel like God isn't listening or He isn't answering. Growing up, everyone told me "God always answers, it's just not always the answer you want." I get it. Just like in parenting, sometimes the answer is no, or not right now, and those are usually not the answers we want.

Is it the Son of God praying in me, or am I dictating to Him?...Prayer is not simply getting things from God, that is a most initial form of prayer, prayer is getting into perfect communion with God. If the Son of God is formed in us by regeneration, He will press forward in front of our common sense and change our attitude to the things about which we pray. - Oswald Chambers

Prayer does not change God, but it changes him who prays. - Soren Kierkegaard

We pray because it changes our lives. We pray because it's who we are. And we pray because God created us to be relational beings and He wants a relationship with us. When we pray, it isn't like placing an order at a drive-thru. We can't dictate to God. We can make requests, pleas, intercessions, etc. We can cry out in anger, fear, pain, and numbness. We can sing praises and thank God for every blessing in our lives. Every prayer we utter, whether out loud or just in our minds, God hears. Meister Eckhart said, "If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, 'thank you,' that would suffice." Romans 8:26-27 says, "And the Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness. For example, we don't know what God wants us to pray for. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groaning that cannot be expressed in words. And the Father who knows all hearts knows what the Holy Spirit is saying, for the Spirit pleads for us believers in harmony with God's own will." 

So what I take from that is this: When we don't know what to say, when we're unsure how to articulate what we're feeling in the deepest, darkest, most neglected corners of our heart - God already knows. The incredible power of prayer comes from the tiniest seed of faith. God already knows our needs and desires even before we do. But He longs for us to voice our pain, to trust Him, to ask His help in fighting our battles, and to lean on His strength. He yearns for our love and desires to lavish His love on us. "We can't keep worrying about how clean the corners of our soul are. If we get caught up in that whirlpool of self-loathing and doubt, we're only headed down. But if we come before the God who makes all things new, believing in faith that he knows our true hearts, we are certain to be uplifted," (Sheila Walsh, Get Off Your Knees And Pray). 

So, you see, the secret to perfect prayer is this: There is no such thing as a perfect prayer. We are imperfect humans with real needs and ugly struggles. The secret to perfect prayer is in knowing that it doesn't matter how we pray; it only matters that we are willing to come before God, humble, raw, and with open hearts. If we are willing to reach out to Him, He will embrace us and accept us for the broken and flawed vessels that we are. He already sees beyond our words to our hearts, and He loves us just as we are. The perfect prayer is the prayer voiced. That's it. 

I am going to continue to study prayer as I work my way through Walsh's book, but for now I hope you will join me in getting off our knees and praying! 

Hapless but hopeful,

Cassie