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Sunday, January 3, 2016

Welcome to God's "I Love Lucy Show!"

Someone very dear to me once told me:

"Cassie, you're like God's "I Love Lucy Show." 

You see, I'm a klutz. I'm often forgetful. Common sense is not always my strong suit. I'm sometimes slow to learn new things because I'm a very visual learner. Have I mentioned I'm a klutz? I also didn't learn some of the skills required to run a home (through no one's fault but my own!). I wasn't always the most helpful, grateful, or respectful teenager, and now that I am a mother and housewife I can see how that potentially qualifies my mother for canonization. The irony is that I now call her for advice that I should have requested years ago when I could learn under her tutelage. Because I didn't, and because I'm such a visual/demonstrative learner, I often have to learn through trial and error.

Thus the name of this blog - "Hapless Housewifery." 

Thankfully I married a very patient man. He comes from a family of incredibly strong and gifted women, all of whom I love dearly. Now that I think about it, I also come from a family of incredible women. My mother was a military wife for over 20 years. She raised four healthy, happy children who love God and her. One of those children was me as the eldest child (poor Mommy...); another was my unbelievably smart, beautiful, and talented sister. I'm pretty sure little sisters are supposed to live in their big sister's shadow, but my little sister eclipses me in every arena. Except swimming. I'm a much better swimmer. I'm okay with her outshining me though because I'm so very proud of my sister and I love her more than any other woman on the planet, aside from my mother. So you see, I'm kind of at the bottom of the talent totem pole in both of my families.

What I lack in talent, I make up for with heart! 

None of this is meant to be self-deprecation. I'm proud of the life I've had so far and what I've managed to accomplish, with a little heart and a lot of God's help. I'm currently a stay-at-home wife and mother. I used to be:

  • Moodles the Cow, the Chick-fil-A mascot. That's right, I wore a giant cow suit throughout my last few years of high school. Scoff if you want, but I got $10+/hr, all the Chick-fil-A I could eat, and into all the biggest state and local events for free. It was a sweet gig, as long as you didn't mind sweating inside a ten foot tall cow. 
  • Active duty USAF as a Logistics Readiness Officer. That meant a lot of things, but mostly that I learned a lot about leadership and management. I met a few leaders I will spend the rest of my life trying to emulate, and a few I will spend the rest of my life trying to forget. Overall, the people made it worth it. 
  • Sexual Assault Prevention & Response Victim Advocate/Response Coordinator (also for the USAF). It's a lot of big words that mean that I worked with military and civilian victims of sexual assault. I walked them through the entire process, from the immediate aftermath of assault to the denouement of the trial process. This was by far the most fulfilling job I had in the USAF.
I've been able to check some pretty cool things off my bucket list:
  • Travel to Israel - check! Thanks to USAFA, JINSA, and my favorite college professor
  • Travel to Greece - check! Thanks to cheap European airlines and a special shout-out to my dear friend, Emily, who single-handedly saved me from becoming a medical hostage (remind me to tell you that story sometime...)
  • Travel to Italy - check! The sites are amazing, but oh the food and wine...*heavy sigh*
  • Travel to Spain - check! Special kudos to my little sister who did a semester abroad there.
  • Own a house - check! So glad I will never have to do that alone again...I'm NOT a handy person by any stretch of the imagination. But I learned I can fix an HVAC unit with my hubby thousands of miles away via FaceTime...
  • Get a dog - check! My sweet Cooper puppy was my "baby" for a couple of years, and I still love him dearly. His giant, fluffy, slobbery love got me through some pretty rough times.
  • Get married - check! Holy cow did I ever win the marriage lottery too! More on that later...
  • Have a baby/babies - check! My sweet baby girl is more love and fun than I could have ever imagined. She is such an UNBELIEVABLE blessing!
So those are the highlights. If you've read this far, you deserve a fresh gooey homemade chocolate chip cookie. Unfortunately, they haven't developed the technology for me to be able to give you that. For now you'll have to accept a digital high-five. I'm going to try to use this blog to share my life experiences with others in the hopes that it might save them from making some of my mistakes, and maybe even help them find better ways to do things! So here goes nothing. I don't have any real expectations, except that I've felt God tugging at my heart to share my voice for a while now. We'll see what happens and where this goes. It may just be me bouncing ideas around in my head, out through my rear end, and onto the screen via a MacBook keyboard. Or it may just touch someone's heart and impact their life positively. Either way, I give this to God and pray that if you're reading this, you have a wonderful life!

Hapless but hopeful, 

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